How To Document People Authentically on Wedding Days
Have you ever wondered how to instantly connect with the people you photograph on a wedding day and how to document these moments authentically? If you're thinking, “Hell yeah,” then I have good news for you. There is a super effective way to do that. I'm super excited to let you in on my biggest kept secret how I document people so authentically on wedding days.
Are you ready for this?
How I Document People so Authentically on Wedding Days:
Memorize the names of the immediate family members and the wedding party before every single wedding day.
By doing this, you can:
Improve your storytelling
Be even more present on wedding days
Create connection and trust not only with the couple, but also with the friends and family
It's a simple strategy, but it does take some effort to implement. However, everything that's worth having is worth working really hard for, am I right?
So if you're wondering, “Sara, how the hell am I supposed to memorize all the names,” then don't worry, I've got you covered. In this blog post, I've laid it all out for you in easy-to-follow steps that will guide you through the whole process.
Why Memorizing Names Matters
The sweetest thing we can hear is our own name.
Think about it! If you meet someone new and they call you by your name, it instantly shows that they care and that they spent the time to get to know you. The same is true on a wedding day.
For example, when I arrive on the morning of a wedding day and I know that the bridal party is getting ready, and an older lady opens the door, it's very likely that it's the mom of the bride. If I know her name, I can immediately engage with her by saying, “Hi! Are you the mom? Sue, it's so nice to meet you!”
And when I say that, they are BLOWN AWAY. I can see the trust barrier drop, and they immediately see me in a different way and trust me more. That opens their heart up to the idea that I care. And it's the same with the bridesmaids, and literally every other person in the wedding party.
It does take some practice, but it's possible to get there. Once you have the names memorized prior to the wedding, all it takes is matching faces with names on the actual wedding day. So do your homework!
And here's how!
1. Create a questionnaire to send out to the couple
5 months before the wedding I send my couples a family + friends questionnaire, where I ask what family photo combinations they want to have on the wedding day. I also ask my couples to list the names of immediate family members and explain the relationship they have with them.
The same thing goes for the wedding party.
By knowing all the names and what these people mean to the couple, it allows you to understand every human relationship in the wedding party, which is so important when documenting the day. Knowing the story also allows you to document their connection authentically.
Are you wondering why I send this questionnaire 5 months in advance? Well, I want to be organized way in advance and prepare for all the photo combinations the couple wants. Getting this done early also helps the next step.
2. Create a template for memorizing the names + photo combinations
Once you have the couple fill out the questionnaire, you can start working on memorizing all the names and the photo combinations. The easiest way to do this is by creating a cheat sheet or a visual template with everything listed out efficiently.
This cheat sheet is so important not only when preparing for the wedding, but also something that allows you to stay 100% organised on the day of the wedding.
The way I do it is I send the questionnaire that the couple filled out to my wonderful virtual assistant Rachel, who then takes the answers and creates a template where the family photo combinations are listed out in the most efficient order possible. This order is important since it saves you time on the wedding day and let's you get it done quickly and in a fun way.
On the template, I have a little legend for everyone. For the bride and the groom (or Partner A and Partner B, if it's a same sex wedding), I have colour-coded units for each of their family members, where it says: mom - Sue, dad - Frank, etc. I usually colour-code the bride's unit purple and the groom's unit green. With that legend, I can have everything organized and laid out clearly.
Once you create this cheat sheet, you can have it with you all day and whenever you need a refresher, it's right there with all the names listed out.
3. Memorize the names in a way that works for you
Once you have a colour-coded template, you can start memorizing all the names. Everyone's different so it's about finding a way that works best for you. A method that works great for me is as following:
Have the names laid out in a way that's easy to remember visually. Think - photographic memory.
Keep those names in my head through remembering by association. I either think of someone with the same name I know personally or pick something rhyming.
Don't worry about not remembering everything perfectly. It does take time and practice to perfect a method that works for you. Also, larger wedding parties can be harder to memorize, but do your homework and have your cheat sheet with you to help.
4. Repeat people's names + call them out when taking photos
Again, our name is the sweetest sound to us. So make sure to greet people by their name and repeat their name back to them. I usually do hugs instead of handshakes and I'll say, “Sally, it's so nice to meet you, I'm Sara!” This tells them that I'm there for them and I care.
When you take photos and call people's names, it literally blows them away!
“Ashley, could you scootch over?”
“Zac, how about you with David now?”
It doesn't have to be awkward, you can be there for them. Walk in with a ton of loving energy because as soon as someone feels good vibes and love, it melts them and creates a space where they can feel free to be who they are.
Things to Keep in Mind
It takes practice. It took me 1-2 years of practice since it's something I created from scratch. Experiment with what works for you + implement.
Use this strategy during the candid parts of the day to make people open up to you.
You can use this as your point of differentiation when couples ask you how you work.
The wedding day isn't only about the bride and the groom. It's about all of their most important people.
And that's not all…
I also want to share with you the actual friends + family questionnaire that I send out to my couples, so if you want to get your hands on that click, scroll down to the bottom of this post!
I hope this helped you. If it did, please let me know by sending me a DM on Instagram (@saramonikaphoto). If you know someone who would like this too, share this blog with them or send them the link to the podcast episode!
Love you guys and thank you so much for reading!
-Sara Monika